Maintenance Required

At the end of a busy week, my car's maintenance light comes on.

Oh no!  Not now!  I don't have time for this!

Maybe you've experienced this yourself.  

Or maybe you sense some foreshadowing here.  Remember the Green Goblin? 

I had a strange symbiosis with my old car. Whenever it got a flat tire, it was a sure sign that my body was headed for a breakdown too.

But this week, that maintenance light takes me by surprise.  

After a pink-ish start, I was moving at a pretty good clip.  By Friday, I even caught up with friends Cécile and Mark for a délicieux déjeuner and petite promenade through the spring blooms of their neighborhood.

And bonus, I met their friend David --
 who's been "walking" with me (via this blog) 
for quite a while!

It was a good week -- a good "normal" kind of busy.

When things are going well, I sometimes forget that traveling with a disability uses a bit more fuel. 

At times, it drains fast and unpredictably.  My body is more sensitive to weather and schedule changes, dehydration, and overuse.  Every activity has a cost attached.

So when I suddenly feel tired and overwhelmed (a.k.a my body's maintenance light comes on), I shouldn't be surprised. 

Yep, it's that.
Exactly.

Even a "normal" week requires careful curating -- and maintenance breaks.  

It's a skill I'm still working on. 

I want to do everything, but I have to give my body what it needs.  Refuel it with short pauses.  

It's frustrating sometimes, but I try to think of them as small doses of self-care.  

It might mean canceling plans.  

Or prioritizing.  

Or scaling back a day to its most essential parts.

  

It might mean taking a breather -- like lying down to do my PT exercises.

Or feeling the sun on my face
first thing in the morning.

Or stopping to smell the flowers -- literally!

Or taking time out to write a "postcard" for this blog.  (Because that's refilling too.)

The challenge, like always, is finding a balance I can maintain.

I drive a different car now.  A hybrid. 

It's small and cute and gets about a thousand miles to the gallon.  (Kidding, of course -- but it goes pretty far on a single tank of gas!)

I wish my body had the same endurance...

As an amputee I'm grateful to be able to drive.  I depend on my car much more than I did when I had 2 legs. 

But that also means paying attention when the maintenance light comes on.  

Even if life is busy.  
Even if it's inconvenient.  
Even if it's just an oil change.

(which I hope it is!)

I know people say there's a time for everything.

I just haven't found it yet. :)